Black Teeth and Minestrone Soup

You guys!

I have got to stop eating black jellybeans. I am totally resembling Michael Keaton in Beetlejuice right now.

I can’t help it. I love them. Do you know those playground ball pit type things that are at fast food restaurants? The ones from which the urban legend of hypodermic needles being buried in the bottom comes from? (Probably buried there by the same person who inserts razor blades into apples and gives them to unsuspecting trick or treaters) Well. I wish I could jump into one that was full of black jellybeans and just eat my way out.

Instead I am here posting this  minestrone recipe. Except that I didn’t add any pasta (had to save my calories for the jellybean eat-a-thon)so it is probably not authentic. But it is good. And healthy. I think my Shred buddy Jillian might even approve. Not that I would ever invite her to dinner or anything.

Look at all this super healthiness! On a side note, doesn’t that olive oil totally look like a big bottle of booze?

It’s not.

The red wine is another reject in my search to replace my favorite.

The only way to chop onions & garlic.

At this point I realize I am in big trouble. Because this is not even half of the ingredients and I am way out of room.

So I pull out Big Blue

I could feed the Duggar family with this and still have leftovers for the Brady’s.

Phew. It all fits.

I suspect I may have not added enough water because in case you didn’t know, I live in the loudest house in the world, and with all the loudness I often lose count of how many cups of anything I am ever adding  to a recipe. But you can’t really screw soup up in that respect. You just keep adding until the consistency is right. If it looks too thick, add a little water. But only a little add a time or else you fall into what I like to call the fruity pebble trap. You know,  when there is a little milk left in the bowl and so you add some more fruity pebs and then it is too dry and so you add a little more milk and then there is too much, so you add more fruity pebs again and it goes round and round like Clark Griswold in the traffic circle (Look kids, Parliament. Big Ben). It is a vicious cycle. It also happens with ice cream and chocolate syrup. And it can happen with soup. Add more water. Ooops. More Veggies. Ooops. Water. Veggies. Water. Veggies.

Infinity.

Minestrone Soup

1 onion (use two if you like a lot of onion-I don’t)

3 cloves of garlic (use double if you like a lot of garlic-I do)

2 cups chopped celery

5 carrots chopped large

2 cups chicken broth

2 cups water (keep track!)

4 cups tomato sauce

1/2 cup red wine (Optional but not for me)

1 cup canned kidney beans (drained)3 zucchini sliced up (sometimes I use the little yellow squash)

1-2 cups frozen green beans

1 Tbl Oregeno (fresh or dried)

2 Tbl Basil  (fresh or dried)

Salt & Pepper to taste

1/2 cup pasta (if you are feelin the need for carbs)

In a ginormous stock pot over medium low heat, saute your onion and garlic for 2-3 minutes. Add the celery & carrots and let it go another 2-3 minutes.

Add the chicken broth, water (keep track!) and tomato sauce. Bring to boil and then reduce to simmer.

Add everything else and keep at low. You want it to go at least 45 minutes, but really the longer the better. I usually let it go for an hour or two. You could also throw in leftover cooked chicken or beef.

If you are adding pasta, you probably want to cook it separately and then add it at the very end. It is also good to sprinkle a bunch of shaved parmesan cheese in your bowl when you dish it up.

Feel virtuous for eating such a healthy dish.

Reward yourself with 47 black jellybeans.

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About Janice

I am 40 years old. Loving life and (finally) being a grown up. I have 3 great kids that sometimes make me want to drink copious amounts of wine. I have been married to my amazing husband since 2001. I have more great girlfriends than you can shake the proverbial stick at. Join me in this adventure that is my life.
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