Toffee Snacks & Costco Rant

Oh. Oh. Oh.

These are good! All flavors & textures combined. You have sweet & salty and crunchy & creamy. The only thing missing is the fat free part. But who cares, right?

It has been a busy week. School’s out for summer and all that jazz. Kids are home all day and Mr. Right is working day shift and my schedule is totally thrown off.

Things like these bars make everything fall into focus. And I won’t lie, they taste delicious when accompanied by a glass of wine.

Oh.

Wait.

I forgot about the Costco rant.

Seven hundred and fifty two people stood around with their gargantuan shopping carts blocking the aisle at Costco.

Why?

Because they were waiting for their free bite of pizza.

Waiting for like 15 minutes.

Who does that?

I must have been in a mood because I was hair raisingly mad. Seriously. I could feel the hair on the back of my neck standing up. You would have thought they were handing out solid gold bricks. I have never said excuse me so many times. I truly wanted to yell at the top of my lungs.

GET OUT OF MY WAY YOU BUNCH OF FREELOADING FREAKS!

Really.

In my vast experience of food service work, I have learned that people will take anything that is free or 99 cents.

‘Hey what is the special today?’

‘Well sir, today’s special is dog poop pizza for only 99 cents’

‘Hmmmm. dog poop pizza huh? I don’t believe I have ever had that before. 99 cents? I’ll take two.’

You will never find me handing my tasty treats out at Costco.

You could use any nuts you have on hand in this recipe. I happened to have almonds, but peanuts, walnuts, cashews, etc. would work fine.

If you don’t have a giant jelly roll pan (and for some reason, I don’t. Weird.) you can use two cake pans.

I had a handful of butterscotch chips left over, so I threw those in too.

Make sure to sprinkle evenly.

And then smother the nuts with the toffee bits. Try to resist eating them by the handful.

Butter & Sugar.

Swirly sweet melted goodness.

You really want to use parchment paper for this recipe.

Pop them back in the oven for a minute or two.

Bring them to Costco a picnic and this is all you will have left.

Salted Toffee-Chocolate Graham Cracker Squares

13 graham crackers
1 8-ounce bag toffee bits
1 1/2 cups coarsely chopped almonds or whatever
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1 cup chocolate chips
3/4 teaspoon coarse salt

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Line a rimmed baking sheet with foil or parchment. Place graham crackers in a single layer on sheet, edges touching. Sprinkle toffee bits and nuts over graham crackers.

In a small saucepan, bring sugar and butter to a boil over medium-high heat. Reduce heat and cook at a rapid simmer, swirling pan occasionally, until mixture is syrupy, about 2 minutes. Immediately pour over graham crackers. Bake until sugar topping is bubbling, 12 minutes.

Remove from oven and immediately sprinkle chocolate and salt over graham crackers. With a sharp knife, cut into 2-inch squares. Let cool completely. Store in an airtight container, up to 1 week. Don’t worry, they will never last a week.

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About Janice

I am 40 years old. Loving life and (finally) being a grown up. I have 3 great kids that sometimes make me want to drink copious amounts of wine. I have been married to my amazing husband since 2001. I have more great girlfriends than you can shake the proverbial stick at. Join me in this adventure that is my life.
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One Response to Toffee Snacks & Costco Rant

  1. Lora Bush says:

    You and I must have been at Costco on the same day…free pizza everywhere…who knew pizza could have such an impact. It serves me right for going on a Saturday (which I never do) and on the Saturday before Father’s Day. I feel your pain…pretty much EVERY time I go to Costco. As usual, you made me laugh 🙂

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